What I’ve Learned between age 29 and 30.

As I stand at the cusp of completing my 30th year alive, I thought about what I’ve discovered about myself and about life during the past year and tried to condense and compile it here.

This year was all about self-discovery, self-actualization, learning what’s good for me despite myself and what I do and don’t like.

Hustle — Every bit of luck I’ve seen others receive, and every bit of luck I’ve had myself has come at the behest of a relentless desire for it and recognition of the hard work needed to achieve it.

Live for your own happiness — No one is going to do this for you. For one thing it’s impossible, because no one is a mind reader and despite any and all good intention they won’t know what will really make you happy. You need to discover that for yourself and work tirelessly to achieve it. Its not selfish. By being happy you enable others around you to be happy too.

Learn to say “No” — You don’t have to always do everything that people want you to do. In fact when someone asks you if you want to do something its better that you wait a little bit and see if the initial excitement about the idea wears off and then decide if you really want to do it. In my experience you should wait the length of time it takes you to finish a beer. Or if you can drink like me… 4 beers. By no means avoid doing anything spontaneous, just make sure that those spontaneous ideas are yours. You’ll likely enjoy them better.

Eat oatmeal — Seriously. It doesn’t taste that great the consistency is like lumpy snot, but it does wonders for your health. If you are on a diet and it says you can’t eat oatmeal, then change your diet.

Seek the experience — Read a book, do some charity work, go someplace new, pick up a new hobby, strike up conversation with a stranger, do some research, throw out a new idea or build something. Everything you’d never done or experienced before helps you grow into a better person. Never be content to be part of the status quo.

Take a vacation by yourself — Its an odd feeling at first because you don’t know what to do, until you realize that you can do anything that you want without the approval or opposition of someone else. If you want to sleep late every day because you don’t get to do it for the other 51 weeks of the year… do it. To hell with what other people think.

Take ownership — Be the one who doesn’t shy away from responsibility. Be the one that people look at to be a leader and yes, sometimes to take the blame. Take the blame willingly and you instantly disarm the person blaming you. They have no choice to move on. Its said that it is easier to ask for forgiveness than permission, and its absolutely true. But in my experience, you really don’t have to do either very often.

Focus on the friends that matter — You know which ones they are because they are likely as close to you as family.

Have a goal — You need to be working towards something. Otherwise, you’re just doing something for the sake of doing it, living a life you never really wanted in the first place. Getting the goal is great and you can ride that sense of accomplishment pretty much as long as the recognition for it lasts. Then you find yourself settling back down and feeling lost from not having anything relevant to work towards. Always keep something BIG in mind to hustle for.

Stop with the duck-face already — For the ladies… it’s not attractive, at all. Please stop.